It looks like there are going to be some major changes in my life soon. I will be moving into a basement apartment soon. I will probably need to find a new job very soon if I do not get to work more hours at my current job. I am trying not to fall in love with a close friend. He knows that he can talk me into giving him more money than I can afford to give. I do not blame him. I am as much to blame for this. I know that he has sex with other men who give him money. I am a bit hurt that he promises to let me suck him without doing so. I think that he does not want to hurt our friendship, but it does hurt that he does it with others not me. I still love him without the sex. I do want him to be healthy and happy. I just have to remember to take care of myself too. As hard as it is for me to believe, a guy who is younger than I may be willing to pay me to suck him.
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